Archives for June 2007

What’s worse than sweaty pearls?

The other day–whichever day was the hottest this week–I saw this girl walking up Bedford and I was totally prepared to give her the Dumbest Girl of the Week Prize. She was wearing: superskinny black jeans tucked into black motorcycle boots, a wifebeater, Wayfarers, and [drumroll please] about 47 pounds of faux pearls around her […]

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29 June 2007 | ick | 1 Comment

Stars are just like us

They’re paranoid schizophrenics too!

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28 June 2007 | popular culture | No Comments

Toys were toys and boys were boys.

I’ll say.

[The second half is all fucked up, soundwise.]

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28 June 2007 | music, sex dreams, dead horse | No Comments

Losing the plot

Reader, I have a tendency to get lost. I get on these kicks where I deconstruct the fuck out of every little thing, and do you know what the result of that is? Nothing makes any sense.
I mean, sure: the world is random and chaotic, all “meaning” is human-manufactured and ultimately a mirage, etc. But […]

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27 June 2007 | meta | 1 Comment

Fuck You, 20 Bayard

Dear 20 Bayard,
Fuck you! We here at Meta-Mirror have never seen such an egregious example of architectural excrement. And now, after months of noise pollution and construction debris, you put a password on your wifi network? Because god forbid the neighborhood people who have to put up with having diarrhea smeared in their eyes […]

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26 June 2007 | assholes | 1 Comment

Eternal Narcissist of Narcissist Mind

Movie productions are common on my block but this is the biggest one yet. It’s for Charlie Kaufman’s new film.
They’ve got Royal Oak shuttered, and they’re not even shooting in there tonight. Orange traffic cones extend for blocks in all directions. The NYPD tow truck is creeping by at this moment, on the lookout for […]

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25 June 2007 | dead horse | No Comments

Babysitter for hire

Reasonable rates.
Many years of experience.
Available immediately.

See collider.com interview, Part 1, 5:15: ha!

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22 June 2007 | cute | No Comments

The sensitive soul to tears, etc.

Three hours a day perusing the job listings on craigslist can make a person in a delicate frame of mind eager to play the slitting wrists game. The hundreds of postings ought to make me feel that there’s a world of employment at my fingertips, but instead, each ad is a reproof: look how woefully […]

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21 June 2007 | personal hells | 1 Comment

Sarah Jessica Parker to make nuclear bomb, literally

Sigh.

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21 June 2007 | popular culture, retarded | 2 Comments

Word of the day!

Last night while I was trying–and, until 3:30 am, failing–to sleep, the word skeevy popped into my head, and it made me laugh out loud.
You know, like LOL.
LOL!
But seriously. What a word! There’s magic in there! The sk, the v, the long e in between… something onomatopoeic in all that, no?
I invite you to take […]

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20 June 2007 | I'm almost a linguist | No Comments

Overheard on Union–real time

“He’s crazy–he sees a psychologist and all this stuff.”
***
“You don’t mind if you sit on the front seat with Patrick on your lap?”
“No, not at all.”
“He likes to sit on laps.”
***
“What do you think this is, a fucking neighborhood?”

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19 June 2007 | random | 1 Comment

All the way to the bank

GAH! I have the flu a virus that feels exactly like the flu, so everything seems horrible and depressing. But some things truly are horrible and depressing.
Starbucks to Release Sonic Youth Celebrity Compilation
Notice how many times Thurston laughs during the interview. Gives me the heebie-jeebies.
[Firecracker aka The Stickler says it is impossible to have […]

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19 June 2007 | WTF, music | No Comments

I have a fever.

Which is maybe imbuing everything with a slightly ghoulish glow.
When I ordered samples of 3/8″ double cell room darkening shades last week, I didn’t give the color names a second thought…

They came in the mail today. So I’m sorting through them: Stucco, sure. Soapstone, okay. Linen. Parchment. But, Altamont?
They’re going to give that color a […]

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18 June 2007 | creepy, superstitions | 1 Comment

Redundancy Dept.

Figure A.

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15 June 2007 | MFABFF, inside jokes | 1 Comment

A whale of a way to die.

Yesterday at acupuncture, Dr. Chen was super-excited to tell me about that really old whale caught off the coast of Alaska. Apparently the poor beast had a 120-year-old weapon fragment embedded in his blubber.
Poor guy was just trying to live.
Anyway, I expected Dr. Chen would turn it into a life lesson, you know, Ancient Chinese […]

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14 June 2007 | random | 1 Comment

Always the last one to know

So this is how it’s gonna be?

I prefer Bridges of Despair over Bridges of Hope. The former is like some totally brutal, little-known collection of poetry that you carry around in your breastpocket; the latter a straightedge band from Delaware who played at The Spiral in 1995 two bands before your boyfriend’s band.
Why they now […]

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13 June 2007 | random | 2 Comments

Proof that it’s not all guilt, hate, existential horror, and weeping around here.

Sometimes, there are miracles.

Lefty gave me a strawberry plant for my birthday last year, and now, lo and behold, it has fructified once more.

Are strawberry plants supposed to survive the winter? And especially, strawberry plants in 4-inch plastic pots?
That sucker was sweet, too.

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12 June 2007 | in earnest, the mind boggles | 5 Comments

Sicko

Last week I was really sick, but I kept going to shows, because I already had tickets, and at the shows I kept drinking, because drinking makes you feel better whether you’re sick or healthy. But, sigh, if you’re sick, it doesn’t make you get better. It makes you get worse. So, bad idea.
It was […]

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11 June 2007 | assholes, creepy, laffs, music | 1 Comment

Poor Deery Lou

So I’m sitting here drinking my coffee, idly browsing antique benches and stools on eBay, when I happen upon THE WORST THING EVER.
It’s this:

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9 June 2007 | creepy | 2 Comments

Screwing myself with my hand

If you are a regular reader of this website, you know that your girl Pistol is a Thinker. You’ll often find me musing about such fascinating and diverse topics as Art and Technology, not to mention weighing in on the most important and controversial issues of today! I’m basically a public intellectual.
Thoughts come at me […]

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8 June 2007 | cute, music, retarded | 2 Comments


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