We Speak of Books, and it is Hot

You’re all dying to know how things are going with my new boyfriend. Here’s a transcript of one of our recent conversations.

Left Hook: Guess what, I finished Anna Karenina!
Daddy: …
Lefty: Yawn.
Daddy: …
Lefty: Haha! Just joking.
Daddy: …
Lefty: Sort of.
Daddy: …
Lefty: But seriously, why is finding God the solution to the plot pickle of like every 19th century Russian novel?
Daddy: …
Lefty: So boring! And false. You know, Easy Street.
Daddy: …
Lefty: You’ve got this lady that’s supposed to be really cool. But then, turns out she’s not that cool. Just EXTREMELY WHINY.
Daddy: …
Lefty: She becomes a jealous freak! I’ll never do that, by the way.
Daddy: …
Lefty: It was kind of hard to believe. The lesson is, you gotta talk about your problems. Like we do.
Daddy: …
Lefty: And the other guy, Levin? Crybaby whiner, then he finds God and whines a little bit less.
Daddy: …
Lefty: What’d I say? Yawn. Right-o!
Daddy: …
Lefty: I love that we can talk about books and stuff.
Daddy: …
Lefty: You’re such a good listener! You want to borrow Anna K?
Daddy: …
Lefty: Then we can talk about it. Together. Doesn’t that sound lovely?
Daddy: …
Lefty: Maybe we can start a book club with Pistol.
Daddy: …
Lefty: God, it’s hot. Isn’t it so hot?
Daddy: …
Lefty: Sigh.
Daddy: …
Lefty: …
Daddy: Why don’t you lie the fuck down and shut the fuck up? [see illustration–ed.]

ILLUSTRATION:

I think you’re starting to see why I’m so crazy about the big goof!

by Left Hook | 3 August 2007 | love, reading | Comments