Archives for the 'bj jokes' Category

Low-tone kids

For a long time I was a nursery school teacher, and every Monday we had a staff meeting during which anti-lulz reached dangerous levels except once this bouncy insane occupational therapist came and jumped around and sprayed scented mists into the air, which was sooooo refreshing and made me feel ready to learn, or at […]

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7 January 2008 | WTF, random, bj jokes | 1 Comment

The rugged caprices of quicksilver minds

At the party on Saturday, Pistol and I lurked by the hors d’oeuvres and discussed blow jobs, in particular the specialty known as the “mediocre blow job”, in which we both have an enthusiastic interest.
Anyway, we soon moved on to other topics of conversation. It’s never dull to be at a party (or a gas […]

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12 September 2007 | bj jokes, mathematics | 2 Comments

God help me.

Reader, I have been through a lot in my life. Loss and betrayal, heartache and infirmity. But right now I’m facing the greatest challenge yet. I have to be Matron of Honor in a Deep South wedding.
FUCK!
The only thing more bizarre than me having to be Matron of Honor in a Deep South wedding would […]

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14 March 2007 | rant, slit my wrists, bj jokes | 5 Comments

Late-afternoon bonus

With love from me to you.
Kanye West was sucking my dick and I broke his jaw.
dude. you’re a legend.
no fucking shit…
dangerous dick.
i’m a lot like the pussy crook.
perhaps i taught him everything he knows about raping and shit.
except you’re more about mouth-raping dudes.
i think.
mostly.
mouth-rape-based.
[…]

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7 March 2007 | bj jokes | 1 Comment

Nu-de play-boy co-ck

A DARK STAGE
From the wings, two voices are heard.
An Internet God: […] The word that was blocked is “fuck.” As you can probably know, this word is common used in spam. If you can possibly use some other word, please proceed.
Meta-Mirror: (To itself: As you can probably know?) Er, there isn’t any possible substitute […]

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18 February 2007 | meta, bj jokes, experimental theater | 3 Comments

Bad bad girl girl

Dear Stephen Malkmus,
I know you’re married, silly! So am I!
But I’m just wondering, when you come home, does your wife get down on her knees and untie your shoes for you?
Or, does she start bitching about how the baby was so cranky all day, and she’s so fucking sleep deprived, and what time did you […]

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12 February 2007 | open letters, bj jokes, creepy | 1 Comment

Enemy combatant

The [tk] Army is a feature we’re going to break out imminently, as soon as we finish hiring an intern apiece, sexually harassing them*, denying everything, stalking them on MySpace, pretending we don’t see them on the subway, and verbally garotting any girls who happen to be glimpsed in their presence. It doesn’t have much […]

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8 February 2007 | narcissism, assholes, bj jokes | 1 Comment


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