Archives for the 'MFABFF' Category
The Ultimate Sacrifice
It took a long time to get home from Brazil–duh, but also because first we flew from Rio to Sao Paulo, and that flight was delayed, and somewhere in there an hour-plus wait on the security line, and then we had a few hours in the airport before the flight to New York, and that […]
Read this entry >>DON’T WORRY. WE ARE NOT DEAD.
Were you afraid we were dead? Aww, that’s so cute. You must really like us!
Things got hairy in Brazil. We caught colds! Then we went to Rio, and we lost our identities. Rio is dangerous, people. So we took off our name chains, lest they be ripped from our necks. And we never take off […]
And we’re off
We have a lot of pills for the plane rides to and from Brazil. Some of them I’ve taken today. “This time I think you should try a whole Ativan,” Lefty said over the phone earlier. “You need to see if it works!” I did as she said, because Left Hook knows best.
Uh, it works.
Now […]
16 days to go…
I had big plans for our Brazil trip. Because I am one of the stars of a hilarious and popular (imaginary) internet TV show, I think in terms of webisodes. This was going to be a great one. Imagine Pistol and Lefty at some teeming sexbeach in Rio…
So many wacky gags therein!!! Pistol, clad in […]
Read this entry >>Mistakes were made
Ladies and gentleman, last night something happened to your blogeuses. Something bad.
Read this entry >>Redundancy Dept.
Figure A.
Read this entry >>The week in review with Left Hook and Pistol Whip
MONDAY. Left Hook is home sick with the flu.
Left Hook: Hello, Pistol? Primordial dwarves on channel 9.
Pistol Whip: Huh?
Lefty: DO IT.
Pistol: Oh, my, God.
Lefty: I know.
Pistol: […]
Lefty: That one is kind of hot, though.
Giggles. An uncomfortable silence.
Pistol: I see what you mean.
Later.
Lefty: Call me an idiot, but I didn’t realize […]
Best Night Ever: the Recap
Left Hook’s birthday night at Youpers!
We started at 9. There were various friends, and Lefty scarfed a whole thing of pad see yew, and it was lovely. But before long, things were reduced to inevitable essences: Lefty and Pistol and the Inspector, shoulder-to-shoulder at the far curve of the bar.
Pistol Whip to Bartender: Do people […]
Brain storm
There are no real advantages to being a migraineur. I really like the Imitrex box, though. It makes me feel like a superhero!
See that lightning? Earlier today, that’s what it was like inside my head.
It also kind of reminds me of this picture of Lefty and me. Wanna see?
All lost at Woodbury Commons
Remember when we went on that all-day adventure with Inspector Corset to those celebrated-but-in-reality-pretty-fucking-disappointing outlets in not-New Jersey? And how people stared at us the entire time we were there? I guess there were some reasons. Like how we were the weird kids who packed our own lunch to eat in the Food Court. It […]
Read this entry >>Live the Life
As I made my way down the bone zone that is the Bedford Ave subway platform, surrounded by leering gaywads, who, it seems, have never seen a girl wear a skirt before, I was once again struck by the phenomenon Pistol Whip has so helpfully pointed out in these pages:
Female + hangover = Oak City.
It […]
Big day
Lefty’s probably making her initial descent at this very moment.
And, today we had our first heckler.
Read this entry >>Exploding stars
So there’s this book I heard about on the Brian Lehrer Show.
The Show I’ll Never Forget: 50 Writers Relive Their Most Blah Blah Blah Blah…
WHAT? I’m sorry, I just fell into a light to no coma. Then I crawled on my hands and knees to the kitchen so I could stab my eyes out, […]
That’s All Right, I’ll Watch it Anyway
Speaking of that night at Youpers, remember how suddenly Elvis was before us, his usual Heartthrob McVainerson pompadour obscured by that lame hat, and we started running circles around him, verbally I mean, barking out the chorus of that Feelies song, demanding he guess guess GUESS which song it was? He couldn’t guess. Dude’s brain […]
Read this entry >>Mr. Before You Know It
Remember when we were at Coco and played “Before You Know It”? I thought about that last night while I watched a rerun of Scrubs. Scrubs is a TV show that takes place in a hospital. It’s way better than, say, 7th Heaven (I’ve never watched an entire episode thereof, but meet it from time […]
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